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Johnny Olsen Photography North Hollywood, California |
All images copyright © 1999-2008
Johnny Olsen • All Rights Reserved
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*LEGAL DISCLAIMER: |
Johnny O is NOT responsible for: |
bad hair days, water retention, runs in stockings,
nasty stares by jealous women, guys howling out windows of cars, traffic accidents caused
by non "street legal" outfits, marriage proposals by random street drifters,
irate traffic cops, angry security guards threatening to call LAPD, stray dogs who i must
return to rightful owner, angry shop owners (hey that's MY wall and YOU can't shoot here),
celebrity sightings, people with little grasp of the english language,
rattle snakes basking in sun on the trail we're walking, bad weather, random
acts of God, cars getting stuck in the mud (hence, postponing the shoot for two hours til
i could find a tow, while being two miles off the nearest road**), sonic booms, wind
strong enough you can't open your car door, men with dart guns in abandoned buildings,
having to change clothes in public, having random "unauthorized" photographers
shooting pictures from afar with a telephoto lens while you have NO clothes on!, people with
disposable cameras telling me how to compose a shot, little old ladies saying "i
think i just saw cindy crawford!", my not loading film into camera,
strobe equipment that works in in the polaroid, but not on the REAL
film, having other old ladies saying "good lord" as you
walk by in a skin tight dress, having to hop a
fence to get to a cool location, moon not being in the right quarter, people coming up to
me as i'm shooting saying "are you a photographer?", homeless guy asking me if
he can hire me to shoot pix of a girl's license plate, that he admires, so he can trace it through the DMV
and get her address(that always worked for me!), having to buy something before being able
to use the restroom, makeup artists with no apparent ability to operate an
iron (hence burning a hole in the SHAPE of the iron in your blouse!!) the SAME homeless DMV lurker guy mouthing off to the guy i'm shooting
who is 6'3" 250# that "i wasn't talking to YOU!", guy trying to run me over
in an alley way with his car, and my having to go "Midnight Cowboy" on him, and
yell "i'm walking here, i'm walking here!!" |
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check please! |
all of which have honestly occurred during shooting at one time or another. |
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On a more serious note, all my work is guaranteed. if you're not happy with the photos and the issue was something that I had control over, we'll reshoot the pictures at no cost to you. |